A while ago, Jessica Anne from Adventures With Three Girls was kind enough to do a guest post about Managing My Life as a Blogger and Mommy.
Since we all handle balance differently, I thought I might add my own story of how I balance life with blogging…
I don’t. At least, not always well. Maybe I’m too hard on myself or maybe I’m just realistic and know my short-comings but, the truth is, balance is hard for me. It isn’t because I lack organization or ideas or even motivation. I don’t have a stressful full-time job or a houseful of kids that need my attention. So why it is so hard for me to obtain balance?
Depression.
It’s an ugly word. For me at least. Sometimes people hear (or read it) and they become judgmental. Sometimes they offer advice, they become uncomfortable or they blurt out “Everybody feels sad sometimes!” Some people think being depressed is just an excuse. For what, I’m still not sure… Others know all to well the pain it can inject into your life and they share their own moving experience.
Depression still has some sort of stigma, though less nowadays, and it can be uncomfortable to wear this label. For me, it is both a handicap and an incredible motivator for change. Daenel, a member here, recently wrote about Better Your Blog in one of her posts, Day 9: Join a Forum and Start Participating. She said that Better Your Blog is:
A forum that proves when life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Created by Alyna to help out a group of women who were frustrated with a blogging workshop they were taking, this group incredibly supportive, understanding and nurturing.
The words were very kind, and her description was accurate on many levels.
It describes my character because, although I struggle against depression, I’m not negative and, in fact, I began blogging in an effort to make metaphorical lemonade.
I wanted to have a “job” that I could do despite having the bad days. I started blogging as a way to try to overcome a deficiency with balance in other areas of my life. Dealing with depression, I am often very tired and low on energy and leaving the house can feel more like running a marathon on most days. Many days I could barely take care of myself. Even as it gets better, I still have these days and blogging is my attempt at figuring out a way to work with my depression instead of against it, since holding down a “normal” job is difficult when you don’t know whether you’ll be capable of getting out of bed.
I started out with a gift blog because I thought I could help people while also focusing on something that I love – finding gifts for people!
Daenel’s description not only describes how I began blogging, it also describes how Better Your Blog was born. Whether it is a bad day or a disappointing “workshop” (those who were a part of that experience know why it is in quotes!), I believe in trying to make the best (or at least better!) of a situation and, failing that, at least trying to learn from it. Because, it is sometimes with the littlest steps that we make significant progress. In fact, I wonder if I have this attitude because of dealing with depression. I have to make lemonade out of lemons more days than I’d care to admit.
Even though I lack balance, it doesn’t prevent me from trying to do my best. If you wobble, try to regain your balance. If you fall, pick yourself up. Balance is something you can practice, whether it is balancing life and blogging, learning how to roller skate, yoga, etc. – just keep at it. Practice really does make better. It never makes perfect!
There will be days that you will be productive and days where you’ll face all sorts of personal and/or technical challenges that will make you wonder if you can do this blogging thing. You can always get help here on the forums (newly designed!) when you need help regaining your balance or just about anything else blogging related. You ask, we try to answer.
You can try to find balance with the use of editorial calendars, time management techniques and even nurturing yourself and taking breaks from blogging when you need to.
The bottom line is this:
Balance isn’t about finding ways to cram more things into an already hectic schedule or setting your expectations of yourself so high that you always feel “behind”. Balance is finding the place where you feel comfortably productive and happy. There isn’t a secret to obtaining balance that you will find in any book or blog. It is something that, with a little trial and error, you will define for yourself and will have to be flexible enough to redefine from time to time – sometimes daily (or even hourly on a bad day!). Balance is not a static or predictable route from A to B, it is an ever changing adventure.
Try to visualize the days that you feel like you’ve achieved balance between blogging and the rest of your life. What happened on those days? Can you recognize some of the things that helped you achieve that balance? (regular breaks, physical activity, making a list, setting a timer to focus on a certain task?) Are there specific things that derail you that you can try to avoid? (spending too much time on Twitter or Facebook, sitting down to work without a clear goal in mind, not setting a clear boundary to define your work time to friends or family?) I would love for you to share some of the ways you feel that you find or lose your balance! Leave me a comment below – don’t forget to sign in first, if you are a member!
Happy blogging!
